Thursday, June 11, 2009

Can I Quit This Job?

Feeling a bit on the "I'm so tired I could crawl up in the fetal position and die" side of life this week... I know that I am a very 'controlling' person, though I'd like to think of it more like a 'take-charge' kind of person, but when did I get elected to being in charge of everything?

Story A
The FIL had knee replacement surgery last Thursday. I am married to the only son of 6 children. Not sure how that makes me 'in charge' of all things related to his family but I guess since his sisters are either big wusses or bitches, that leaves me, right? So besides ME and the MIL, who else sat in the waiting room during surgery? That would be my husband and his little brother. His little brother is really his nephew, and if you have followed me for a long time you would know that my husband's oldest sister, whom I don't even recognize as a human being, thus she definitely falls into the bitch category, but has no given name, abandoned her son at the age of 2 to be raised by his grandparents because her then fiance refused to allow that half 'rican live in his house. Nice, right? He's now 34 and for all purposes related to me and my family, the little brother.

So you might ask, where were all those sisters? Um, busy? Nevertheless, I took good care of my MIL and FIL that entire day even if I was there from 6 am until 7pm. The following day we had planned on leaving town to attend a football camp with C3, and we did although it was cut from a weekend away to a 17 hour round trip ride to Austin and back because... Because the sisters could not handle the responsibility of the in-laws for one day! Before we were an hour out of town the calls started coming and they all expected me to snap my fingers and make miracles happen. I was supposed to determine, by 5:00 pm, which of four rehab facilities that my FIL would go to from the hospital. Didn't matter that I was going to be more than 4 hours from the homestead. I was also called to clean up the mess that the sister with no name caused when after all these years she decided to rear her little head and decide that she was 'concerned' about her father. Yes, after not being able to reach my MIL by cell phone or in the hospital room (she had gone home to shower and eat) sister with no name called the hospital and demanded to speak to the head nurse about her father's care... After cursing and berating the head nurse about this care (which I'm not sure she can determine since her happy ass hadn't BEEN to the actual hospital), she then left a cursing and berating message for my MIL on her cell phone and instructed her that she was not allowed to EVER leave his side AGAIN and if she did, she was to call sister with no name and inform her of her reason to leave and whereabouts. Of course this started a whole course of sobs and complaints from Wuss 1 and Wuss 2, and they needed me to handle it. Hmmm...

So bright and early Saturday morning, I took a big batch of donuts and sausage rolls with me to the hospital to do some major ass kissing with the nurses and make sure they did not smother my FIL in his sleep. Then came Sunday when Bitch One and Bitch Two reared their little heads and told the MIL that they did not want their father going to a 'nursing home' that they felt he should be attended to at home. Yes, great advice from two women that were 'too busy' to take the time to come wait during surgery. Let's not even take into consideration that the MIL is nearing 80 and has a hernia that is scheduled to be operated on next month. And did these two plan on volunteering their services to attend FIL's needs? Uh, no, they have to work. More phone calls and more sobs from Wuss 1 and Wuss 2... So off again I go to the hospital bright and early Sunday morning to lay the law down to my MIL and FIL because of the fear that the idiot sisters, Bitch One and Bitch Two, put into their heads about 'nursing homes'. GAH!

Thankfully he is currently rehabbing quite nicely at the rehab center of MY choice and we hope to have him up and at 'em and home in a week...

Story B
We had some severe storms roll in last night and even a tornado or two. As I was watching the news I noticed that a possible tornado had been spotted and was heading directly toward the little town that C1 lives and has his gym. Knowing that he pays no attention to such, I called him but had to leave a message because, well because HE NEVER answers my calls. He's busy you know...

About 45 minutes later, I receive a frantic phone call from C1 because the tornado sirens are blaring and the wind is blowing 80 mph and the rain is seeping through the glass wall (that would be the entire front wall of his gym) and flooding the gym. He is panicked and asks me what to do? Uh, seek cover? I asked him if anyone was in the gym and of course being right after work it was packed, so I told him to get everyone into the interior restrooms and ride it out. He immediately starts shouting the orders before we lost connection. Yep, picture that, Mr. Big Bad Ass Business Owner calling his mommy and asking her what to do in an emergency? Priceless.

Story C
After the bad storms last night, we were still having some bitchin weather this morning. About 10 am, I received a text from the BIL (see above) which said, "Hey! Can you call me? Nothing wrong." Assuming that it had to do with either the MIL or FIL or possibly the sister with no name (which btw they do not speak and she has never been involved in his life) I immediately called him back. Here's his story - His wife, S, went into labor about 2 am, after going to the hospital at 7 am they decided to send her home because she had only dilated to a 2. Their house didn't have any electricity (tens of thousands of people still don't) but he left her there with their 5 year old son and was going to work. Could I call and check on her? WTF? STOP! Because of the horrid reception and the storm it actually took three or four phone calls to get that much out of him. So then I berated him for being an idiot.

First, they live 30-45 minutes away from the hospital IF the moon is aligned correctly. Second, they had NO ELECTRICITY. Third, he was heading to work which was 45 minutes in the OPPOSITE direction, in a STORM, so it could possibly take him 2 or more hours to get from work to get her and then to the hospital. What was he thinking? I immediately call S to inform her that I would come pick her up and take her to my house, which has electricity AND air conditioning, which is only 5 minutes from the hospital. She doesn't answer. Not the house phone or the cell phone. I then panic. What if she falls asleep and goes into real hard labor and dilates to a 9 before anyone can get there? Huh? Then what happens if I get there during this process and she has the baby in my car? Huh? Not in MY car!

Needless to say, she finally called me back, the contractions are still 5 minutes apart and she says she is fine. Oh, and the electricity came back on. Oh, and I guess I have to now cancel the shower I am throwing for her on Saturday... Apparently now I am not only in charge of the elderly and the lame, I am also in charge of the newborns - GAH!

Can I quit this job?


Betsy said...

Is it really possible to fall asleep and not know your in labor until your a 9 & it's too late????

Jess said...

OMG. I thought my in-laws were bad but yours take the cake. How did you end up being in charge of everything? I cannot imagine my family turning to my husband to make decisions about my parents' health care. Very bizarre.

Joisey said...

We survived the storm last night with just a few branches down in the yard. My left ear drum burst with the pressure from the storm. Of course it was bound to happen with the migraine and the ear pain I'd already had. Stayed home yesterday and today from work. We've got another good storm burst coming up from the SW. If you ever need to escape to where no one can finde you, call me. They'll never find you here. Love ya, Girl.

Tracie said...

But your doing such a good job! I'm thinking there's another sister to something to deal with! Kick A!

flooz said...

Your inlaws are taking lessons from my sisters apparently. I know of no solution outside of murder but I'm too busy doing the things they won't do and besides I'd have to be in physical contact with them to get that done. I am waiting for "what goes around comes around," but I've been waiting for that a LONG time and that probably negates any good karma I might have built up over the last couple years. Sure wish I could stop thinking about it. Yes, you may take more than a moment to bitch--you've earned it.

Pat said...

OMG, we must lead paralle lives!!! My whole damn life has been about what you just described!!! I feel your pain my friend. My mother is having both knees replaced soon and my diva sister is 400 hundred miles away and guess who gets to take care of mom oh what the hell I've done it since dad passed away in 1981!!! Yes 28 years all mine. Grand daughter that had Hayden, well guess what she is pregnant again too!!!! I asked her what do you not understand about birth control? She counts on me so, but I told her mother my daughter its your turn to step up to the plate. I've raised my three, helped you with your two and now Hayden and guess what I quit!!! Now we both know that is a lie, if she needs me I will be there as you. Its a gift Kat, you and I are born leaders and the rest of the world is stupid!!! Can we quit???
Hang in there girl , we may be menapausal bitches but we're good bitches. Try and rest this weekend. Hugs, Pat

Jeankfl said...

I'm with you and Pat.. let's quit this sh**. Unfortunately, we can't, because we'd go nuts with no one there to do it!! We do it because we have some sense, and a sense of duty, and love. As ticked as I get, I'd rather be like me than like them.. That's why we love you!!! You're like us!
I think it's adorable about

Hawkeye Chick said...

WTF is a sausage roll??

And no, you can't fugging quit woman, too many people rely on you. Heavily.

Small Town Girl said...

Funny thing is I read right over the top of that sausage roll thing....probably because it was right next to the word DONUT.

Hope you get to relax this weekend and NOT deal with other people's drama!

Jane! said...

I'm stuck back on the sausage rolls, too. What the heck?

You know what they say; if you want a job done, give it to the busiest bitch, I mean, person.

Hang in there, Kat. I hear stress burns calories. That is if it doesn't kill you first.